It took me a week to ask my coworker if he could connect my computer to the printer. A WEEK! I had no reason to be nervous to ask but my anxiety had me in a chokehold. I had spoken to him numerous times about a variety of topics, he’s a nice dude from what I can tell. But there was something holding me back from asking for help.
My anxiety said, “Megan you’ve had him do so much shit on your computer already, stop asking for help, he’s probably annoyed.” His job is IT guy so it’s what they pay him to do!
On Wednesday and Thursday I had my head between my legs to try and calm myself down because I was so anxious. I tried to listen to some of my favorite pop music to lift me up but it didn’t help.
Every time I get a new job my mental health takes a nose dive. During my 8 hour days I am buzzing with anxiety over speaking to my coworkers and trying to make a good first impression for my boss and supervisor. I leave the office and my mood drops into a depressive state. I force myself to keep busy so I don’t get caught up in my head.
I hope that this anxiety and depression does not last for ages.